Is It Me?
by araghu
Summary: I have always wondered why the show doesn't explore Jay Halstead's character even further. He seems more than a former soldier turned cop in love with Erin Lindsay. This is my first story and I hope you like it. I'm thinking it's going to be short, but who knows, lets see where it takes me.
1. Prologue

_I have always wondered why the show doesn't explore Jay Halstead's character even further. He seems more than a former soldier turned cop in love with Erin Lindsay. This is my first story and I hope you like it. I'm thinking it's going to be short, but who knows, lets see where it takes me._

 **Prologue**

May 5th 1997

The Halstead family is asleep all over the hospital room. Dr. Halstead is sprawled across the big couch in the room, Will is on the cot next to him, and Mrs. Halstead is on the hospital bed after being in labor for 16 grueling hours. The only one not asleep is Jay. In fact he's not even in the room. He tiptoed out of the hospital room and made his way up to the NICU. One of the nurses saw him from the nurses' station and walked up to him.

"Hey there Jay!" Everyone knew Jay and Will because their father worked there. "You want to see him?"

"Yeah. He's all alone and I don't want him to be scared when he wakes up."

The nurse took him to the incubator in the next room. Jay walked up and looked at his youngest brother, then changed his gaze to the name on the whiteboard next to the door.

 _Akhil Ricco Halstead._

 **Jay POV**

I walked into his room and saw him. There he was peaceful and so tiny. He was born early, wasn't due for another five weeks. I looked at him. There was just something about him that made want to shelter him from the rest of the world. I know I'm just 7 years old, but I can still tell that the world is a scary place. I will protect him just like I protect Will.

"Hey little man, its me Jay. I'm your big brother. You actually have two big brothers but I'm the oldest. I promise to always look out for you. I will take care of you and protect you from everything bad, even the monsters under my bed. I'm pretty sure Will is going to protect you too. You're the one thing that my family hasn't been so hostile about. We all love you. I promise, nothing will ever happen to you."

Jay spent the rest of that night sitting by his brother's side, hoping that he will never let him down.

 **Third POV**

For the next 12 years, Jay, Will, and Akhil were inseparable. They went to the same private school so they were always together at lunch, after school at sports or in any clubs, and at home. Jay and Will were always Mr. Popular, hanging out with the cool kids and forming their own posse. Akhil was different though. He didn't have any interest in being popular, and he was fine with it. He has his own friends and his own social life, but was always back home to spend time with his brothers.

After Jay left for the Ranger and Will went to college, Akhil was left all alone. He wasn't picked on or anything, hell if anything he was better than Jay and Will, but he never wanted popularity. He didn't hang out with the rich and snobby kids. He played Football and was a part of the Marching Band, so he would either spend his time training or playing music. You would see him play running back for two quarters, play the snare for the halftime show, then get back and win the game. And it wasn't like he was bad. He broke both school and state records in Football, and made state and national band for percussion.

Despite his different interests in high school, Akhil decided to follow in Jay's footsteps. He enlisted after high school and decided to surprise Jay with the news. Everyone was proud of Akhil. He always wanted to make his brother proud and didn't stop at anything.

However, after their mom died, Jay broke. He stopped coming home, was drunk most of the nights. Hell, Akhil was lucky if Mouse could ping his phone because he never wanted to be found.

And then one night, Jay left without a word. No one knew where he was. Akhil was mad. Never had he done anything to make Jay leave. After their mother's one-year death anniversary, Jay still didn't show up. Akhil gave up on him. He decided that he didn't care and left for his tour. Little did he know that 4 years later he would have to face him again.


	2. Chapter 1: Intelligence

Chapter 1: New Partner

 **Jay POV**

14 days. That's how long it's been since we lost Jules on that op. 14 long grueling days, but just like each and every one of them, I got up and went to work. It felt like it was my fault. I had a bad feeling before going to that apartment complex to get Pulpo. Hell, that was my job in the Rangers. Scout and make sure that the op was possible. Only this isn't Iraq or Afghanistan. This is Chicago and now we all lost a person we love. Jules was there for me when I was at my worst. I just wish that I could have saved her. My thoughts are interrupted with Voight walking out into the Bullpen.

"Alright listen up. We are getting a new member to Intelligence. He's 24 and just out of the Rangers. From what I hear, he's the reason we got Bin Laden. That doesn't mean that he gets any special treatment," he said while looking at each and every one of us.

"That being said, we lost one of our own. We may never be the same again, but let me make one thing clear: This is not a replacement. Antonio, can I speak to you for a moment?" Voight and Antonio walked into his office and started talking. I changed my gaze to my partner Erin Lindsay who just raised her eyebrows and shrugged her shoulders, getting back to the massive amount of paperwork we needed to complete.

 **Erin POV**

Antonio walked out and went down stairs. To say he was pissed isn't enough to describe how angry he was. Jay walked to the locker room. Everyone knew that he blamed himself, but no one knew why. _Its not like he pulled the trigger or could have done anything. Why is it so hard to understand him?_

Dawson came back with a man behind him. He looked like someone familiar, but I couldn't really figure it out. He was at least 6 feet tall, had broad shoulders, wore a black leather jacket with a black hoodie just like Jay, and had a pair of blue jeans on. They walked straight into Voight's office. They sat down and talked. Voight gave him his intelligence badge and his gun.

"This is Akhil Raghu," Voight spoke. "He is the oh so special ranger. Raghu, this is the team. Erin Lindsay, Alvin Olinsky, Adam Ruzek, and you already met Antonio Dawson. We have another member, but looks like he's busy. That's your desk across Dawson's. You need to go get your paperwork from Platt downstairs. Welcome to Intelligence." Voight shook his hand and left.

 **Akhil POV**

Voight left and everyone kind of just stood there. I decided it's now or never.

"Hi, my name is Akhil Raghu. I am a former Ranger." Everyone then decided to introduce themselves.

I went downstairs to retrieve the paperwork and then came up to my desk. Before I started on it I took off my dog tag chain, which had the tags from my team. I opened the drawer and put them in there, only to look up and see everyone looking at me.

"What? Is there something on my face?" I asked.

Erin came forward. "No its just, my partner is also a former Ranger, and he did the same thing his first day here. Is this like a Ranger thing?" She asked.

The look on my face kind of answered her. Once she said Ranger, my mind went to Pakistan, the last time I saw my team alive. Eight of us walked into those hills, only I made it out. Someone entering the room and sitting down on his chair making a really loud noise interrupted my thoughts.

"That would be my partner, Jay Halstead."

I looked up so fast at her face and thought I was going crazy. "I'm sorry who?"

"Jay, come meet the new guy." Erin said.

He turned around and I was right. I was going crazy. There he was right in front of me. It had been almost 5 years since I had seen him and he was here all along. I looked at him like I saw a ghost and he did the same. Everyone looked between us like it was a tennis match.


	3. Chapter 2: Ghost

Chapter 2: Ghost

 **Jay POV**

Was I dreaming? Is he really standing there in front of me?

After what seemed like hours, I walked over to him. He was still shocked. I started tearing up and right as I was about to hug him, he put his hand up and stopped me. I saw his face change from surprised to angry.

I broke the silence. "4 years, huh?"

He scoffed. "No Jay. 4 years, 8 months, and 19 days. 4 YEARS, 8 MONTHS, AND 19 FUCKING DAYS JAY." He screamed. The way he screamed wasn't just out of anger, but sorrow, it just broke my heart.

"Little man, I-", He cut me off. His voice was not loud, but you could hear the command in his voice even when it was barely louder than a whisper. It was the kind of voice that meant _if you don't shut up now, I will kill you_.

"No. You lost the privilege to call me that. All this time you've been here. Not one phone call, not one text or email. Do you know what I have been doing since you left? Do you know how many times I needed you? Do you know that the only reason I went back overseas each and every time was because I thought you were dead and I had no one to come back to? DO YOU?!" His voice rose at each sentence. Voight came out of his office.

"RAGHU, you want to stay in this unit, you better act like it."

"Raghu, since when do you call yourself that?" I asked. He walked up to me, eye to eye.

"Since my own brother died 4 years ago." Dawson pulled Akhil away and made him sit down.

"Finish your paperwork. You and I need to get some work done later. You're my new partner, but we still need to get some rules laid out."

And with that, Akhil finished his paperwork and left with Dawson, leaving me in my chair to figure out what the hell just happened. Erin walked up to me with a face that said _tell me now_.

"How do you know Raghu?" She asked.

I turned my head to her and said, "Because he's my baby brother."

 **Third POV**

Antonio walked Akhil to his car and they drove off. It was mostly silent until Antonio parked at a diner and they both walked in and sat down.

"So, Akhil. How do you know Jay and why were you so pissed?"

Akhil looked at him and tried to figure out how to respond. "How much do you guys know about Jay Halstead?"

"I've known him for a long time. He was a detective in Gangs when I first met him. I know he has a little brother who works at Chicago Med. His mom died and his father is a no show. He's been in the army and he is a solid police man."

"Wow, so he didn't mention me at all, huh?" I asked. I was very pissed at the fact that Jay left me out.

"What do you mean he left you out?"

"My name is Akhil Raghu now, but before it was Akhil Ricco Halstead. As in Jay Halstead's brother."

Antonio's jaw was son its way to the earth's core.

"And Will is here? I thought he was in Boston, or was that New York? Lord knows where he was."

"Wait! Brother?!"

"The second younger brother of Jay Halstead."

"So what happened?"

"As much as I would love to bitch about Jay and what happened, I can't tell you until he is comfortable with it. So you're gonna have to ask him."

Dawson's phone rang. "Dawson… yeah on our way." He ended the call. "Let's go partner, we got a case."

 **Akhil POV**

The case was about some guy named Charlie. He and a group of friends were getting ready for a heist, but we caught him. Turns out his buddies were still out there and we got a location. We ended up going to a warehouse and bullets started flying the second we parked. Antonio and I took cover behind his truck while Jay and Erin behind their Chrysler 300. I saw a guy shooting at Jay from a window on the second floor. It took me two shots with my gun, one to his gun and one to his head. Jay looked over at me and I just looked away. The four of us were walking towards the warehouse, when a van just sped out. Jay and I were the closest to the 300, so I ran and got in the driver's seat. Jay got in the passenger right before we sped off.

We were following the van, right behind it. Hell I almost crashed 3 times to get that close. Finally Jay shot the rear left tire and the van toppled. We got out and I went around to clear the back. When I cleared it, a guy was standing in front of Jay about to shoot. I got my gun and shot him once where his heart was. He crumpled to the ground and Jay looked at me.

Jay got out his cellphone and called Voight. "Voight, we got them. All offenders down."

Once the scene was cleared Erin and Voight walked up to me. Voight spoke first.

"If you ever pull that kind of crap again, you-" He didn't even get to finish his sentence. Jay stood up and got in between Voight and me.

"If he didn't pull that kind of crap, I would be dead. You said it yourself, he's one of the best." Jay stared down Voight. I looked at him and spoke.

"Jay, let him speak. What are you going to do Sargent? When I was called, they said every case is an extenuating circumstances type case. If I didn't get in the crossfire, Jay would be dead. You would have lost another of your team."

Voight looked at both of us and said, "Just make sure you take the right car." He practically growled that last part to me. Erin looked at Jay and me and just walked off.

"Is he really pissed off that I did this? Man, he should have never asked for a Ranger."

Dawson walked up to me. "I'm going to Molly's. Come with us." We went upstairs and I went into the locker room. I looked at myself in the mirror. My hands didn't stop shaking since I shot two of them.

"Never got over it, huh?" Jay was right behind me.

I didn't turn around. I was just looking at the wall in front of me. "The last time I held a gun, I lost seven of my best friends. Two of them had kids on the way, and it was my fault. I didn't step in the crossfire and take the heat from them. At least they had family to go back to." Without another look at Jay, I walked out of the locker room. Erin was outside. I'm pretty sure she was listening.

I turned to her and said, "Your partner is one of the most important people in my life. I'm sorry I stole your car, but I'm glad that it was me who put a bullet in that guy."

She put her hands up. "Hey, I actually wanted to thank you. He may be a knucklehead, but he's a good detective and has my back 24/7."

I laugh. "Knucklehead is too nice. Maybe jackass."

I turned and walked away from her. I walked upstairs and got my dog tags. I left the precinct and got on my Harley Roadster and sped off to Molly's. Dawson gave me the address. I walked in and ordered my favorite beer, a Corona. Dawson called me over to his booth and he introduced me to Atwater and Burgess. Jay, Erin, and another girl walked into the bar. That girl was gorgeous. She walked over with them and I blushing so hard that I left to get another beer.

"Hey Akhil, can we talk?" Jay walked us over to another booth and he sat down. "So let me talk for five minutes and then you can do what you want." I nod asking him to continue. "I'm really sorry for leaving. I wasn't my self and I had to get away from every one and everything back home. I never meant to hurt you, and I always wanted to come back, but it was too late and I thought you were better off without me."

It was my turn to talk. "You left. I spent my entire life looking up to you and you left. She was not just your mom. She was mine too. Do you know when we raided Bin Laden's house, I was praying for a bullet to hit me. I wanted them to take away the pain I was feeling for years. The anger and guilt for wondering why you left." I took a sip of my beer to stop myself from tearing up. All of Intelligence was looking at us.

"I am sorry. I will make it up to you." Jay put his fist up.

"Man we haven't done that in forever."

"Do you still remember it?"

"Do I?"

We both got up from our chairs and fist bumped, blew it up, brought it back, and then chest bumped. Right after, Jay and I looked at each other before bursting in laughter. Jay gave me a bear hug and I picked him up off the floor. Intelligence was cheering and Erin gave Jay a look. The same look I saw on my friend and his wife's face.

"You like her." I said.

"Wait what?"

"Jay, you like her." His face gave it away. "Oh you so like her. Wait a minute you love her. Damn, I sure missed a lot."

"Shut up. What about you? Have you been with anyone?"

"Nope."

He looked at me. "You had no one." I shook my head no. "Holy crap, you're a virgin." I shushed him up and looked around. "I bet you didn't even have your first kiss. Come on man."

"What do you mean 'Come on man'? Yeah I'm a 23-year-old virgin who hasn't even got to first base. You know me man. I said it would be with the girl I will be with for the rest of my life."

"Ok. So what's with the name change?"

"Dad was a fuck up, you and Will left, and mom died. I found out that mom had relatives from India, hence my tan skin, and their name was Raghu. They live in Chicago and I stayed with them. Well, you know the rest."

"Alright, well what about now. You have any eyes for anyone?"

"Who is that with Erin?"

"That's Nadia. And I don't think you should."

"Shut up. Let's go." We walked up to the table. Ruzek was saying some lame joke and Jay sat next to Erin while I sat next to Nadia. Erin spoke next.

"So Akhil, tell us a little about yourself."

"Well, as you know from this morning, I am Jay's youngest brother. I am 23 and enlisted at 18. Did four tours then came home. I got a call from the Commissioner asking if I want this position and I said yes. I live by two codes. Actually, my team and I did. The first: we die protecting, so you may live to serve. My team and I were always together. If not on tour, we had jobs and did community service for all veterans and their families. The second, and this may be a little harsh, but here it is: you touch my loved ones, and I will hunt you down. Plain and simple."

Everyone except Voight was shocked. He looked at me with a smile and I swear his smile is really scary. I turn to Nadia.

"So, who are you?"

"I'm Nadia."

"Nice to meet you Nadia."


	4. Chapter 3: Invincible

Chapter 3: Invincible

 **Akhil POV**

I needed more alcohol. Maybe Jay and I are fine now, but that doesn't mean I forgive him for leaving. All I can do is take it day by day. I go to the bar to get my third beer. The bartender comes up. I think Jay said his name was Herrmann.

"So what can I get ya?"

"I'll take another Corona."

"Man I have never seen someone who actually like Corona."

"It's a funny and long story. Maybe I'll tell you one day."

Hermann laughs. "So I hear you're new and a former soldier."

"Actually I am still a soldier. I just decided I need a break after doing more time than needed."

"Alright, well I am a firefighter. I work at Firehouse 51."

"Wow. That's gnarly. The city needs more people like you. Well thanks for the beer. Take care Hermann." I walked away towards Nadia.

"So Nadia, tell me a little bit about yourself."

"Well I am 19. I actually was a CI for Erin a while back. I just got out of rehab and I am working at 21 at the desk starting Monday."

Erin speaks up. "And she makes us damn proud."

I couldn't take my eyes of Nadia all night. She is so sweet and beautiful; it makes me feel like I am in high school all over again. Erin must have saw me doing that because she called me over to the bar.

"Look, I know you're new and Jay's brother, but I am taking care of Nadia. I don't want anyone to take advantage of her and I would really appreciate it if you didn't."

I raise my right eyebrow at her, the one move Jay helped me perfect when we were kids. "Erin, with all due respect, I don't care what you think. First of all, you know the codes I live by. Second, I don't even know what I am feeling. I sure as hell would never take advantage of anyone; our mom raised us better than that. So I am going back to the table, and I am going to pretend this didn't happen."

I walk back to the table to see Nadia looking straight at me. At first, I turned to see if she was looking past me, but her eyes moved in my direction. She must have noticed, because she turned away and started blushing. I look at Jay and tell him I'm calling it a night, but he has other plans.

"Wait, where are you staying?" Jay asked.

"At a hotel for now. Trying to get a place in a few days."

"Stay with me. I have room and plus I want to make up for lost time."

"Ok. I'll come by tomorrow. Text me your address."

With that I walked outside and took a deep breath. When I sat on my motorcycle, I heard someone calling my name. Turns out it was Dawson.

"Hey Akhil, what are you doing tomorrow?"

"Just hanging out. Why?"

"I own a gym not to far from here. Why don't you swing by around 7 Monday morning?"

"Alright. See you then." And with that I put my beats earphones, and rode away.

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I enter the gym at exactly 7 am. Time is something you don't mess with in the army. I walk in to see Antonio talking to Jay while he's hitting the punching bag. Jay stops and sees me.

Antonio speaks first. "So Halstead, when are you going to get in the ring with me?"

Jay raises his eyebrow, just like I did last night. "Hopefully never."

"Why?" I asked.

"Antonio here is a state champion at boxing." Antonio looked at me.

"He's just scared that I can kick his ass." I look at Antonio.

"I'll go." Antonio smiles and Jay says, "Oh this I gotta see."

Antonio gives me a pair of gloves and headgear. We both enter the ring and tap our gloves. I can tell Antonio wants to see what I can do, so I though I'll go easy. I punch at him, just to see how hard he can hit and how good he is. He easily dodges my punches and sends three to my abdomen, which should have made me bend over, but because of certain techniques I learned in the army, I could take them. So he's looking at me like _what the hell?_ I take advantage of this and send two punches to his abdomen and one to the side of his face making him go down. He could tell I was experienced and stopped it. I took off my headgear and helped him up. We got out of the ring and walked over to Jay whose jaw was hanging. I smiled at him then looked at Antonio.

"So where did you learn to hit like that?" Antonio asks me.

"I've had my share of fist fights overseas. We weren't always guns and bombs." Antonio and Jay looked at me like I was crazy.

Jay speaks up. "What exactly did you do over there?" I look around and it's just us three in the gym. I take a seat on the side of the ring and took a deep breath.

"My team and I were an elite special forces team. We would be called for what the Seals couldn't handle. I enlisted as a Ranger, but they bumped me up to this team out of nowhere in training. We were trained to infiltrate and dismantle terrorist organizations. My team and I were given Al-Qaeda." I took a deep breath while all the memories came back. "Four months ago, my team decided to trail the Haqqani Network after reports of them supporting Al-Qaeda. We entered the mountains along the Pak border. The plan was to attack and immobilize a 200-man army in those mountains, but the Intel we got was wrong. It wasn't 200, but 2,000 men. And you know why, because the Pak army and ISI support the Haqqani Network. Anyway, seven people died that day. Two wives and four husbands, one mother and two fathers. We never had a chance and it was my fault. I decided to stay behind and let my team escape. They all had families to go back to and I felt like I didn't. Besides, they can't really argue against their squad leader."

"Squad leader?!" Jay practically screams. "You were squad leader at 23?"

"Yep. You want to know why? Because of my sincere dedication to put my life ahead of my team's or anyone's really." I said mocking my general's tone.

Antonio gave me a _you've gotta be kidding me look_ and Jay gave me a _that's bullshit look_.

Jay looked into my eyes and asked, "What's the truth?"

"Uh-uh. We are not there yet buddy. I love you and I will save your ass as many times as I can, but we are not there yet. I'm really trying here Jay, but it's going to take some more time to get past the last 5 years."

After that, I got up and headed to the showers. I am going to give Jay a chance, but it's not going to be easy for him. After stepping out and changing into my clothes, I sling my bag over my chest and get on my bike. I race through the streets to get to 21. However, I hear on my police scanner that there is a fire at a house not to far from here. So I turn left and head for the house. I get off my bike and hear screams from the house. I take my scarf from my bag and wrap it around my head and enter the house. The fire is contained in the living room, but the screams were coming from upstairs. I open the door and see two little girls in the corner of their bedroom. I run over to them and cover one with my jacket and one with my hoodie. I carry each one in each arm and run to the stairs to find that the stair are on fire and look like they're about to collapse. I see the window and that there is grass on this side of the house. I take three steps back in the room and tell the girls to hold on. Next thing I know I am flying out the window with my back to the ground and the girls on my chest. I fall down with a _umph_ and feel my head ringing. I turn my head to see 51 and intelligence looking at me while the paramedics ran to me.

"Take a look at them first, I'm fine." I say and try to hand over the girls. They are still crying and clutch harder onto me. "Hey its ok. These people are going to take care of you and take you to the hospital."

One of the girls looks at me. "Can you come with us?"

"Sure. I just have to let you get checked first ok?" And with that, the girls are in the ambulance getting checked out. Jay runs up to me screaming.

"ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR FUCKING MIND? YOU COULD HAVE DIED IN THERE!"

"Jay, its fine."

"FINE? FINE? YOU ARE COVERED IN SOOT! DON'T YOU LEARN FROM YOUR MISTAKES? YOU ARE NOT INVINCIBLE!"

I don't say anything, but I walk straight to him eye to eye. I keep my mouth shut since 51 and 21 are pretty much watching this clown. I look at Jay with a stare that says _shut the fuck up or I will kill you_. He gets it and backs off. I walk over to my bike where my bag is. I take out a bottle of water and drain it down my throat. I walk over to the ambulance and check on the girls. They are fine and the paramedics take them to Chicago Med.

Voight walks over to me. "You ok, kid?"

"Yeah I'm fine. How did you guys know I was here?"

"We got a case in the neighborhood and saw your bike. I have to say, that was pretty ballsy kid."

"Code number one." I replied, winking at Voight.

He laughs. "Alright kid. Let's get to the district."

I am about to get on my bike when a firefighter walks up to me.

"That was something."

"Hey Hermann."

"I know your new, and that you are a soldier, but what the hell were you thinking?"

"I was thinking I heard two girls screaming, and I would rather die than stand by and watch."

"That's a dangerous game to play kid. You could have been seriously burnt."

"I've had worse." Baffled by the statement, Hermann watched as I leave for the district.

I park my bike and enter the precinct only to have the delightful Platt see me.

"Well, well, well if it isn't for Soldier Charcoal."

I give her a mock salute and head on upstairs to the locker room. I was covered in soot and needed to take a shower. After my second shower of the day, I get out in my towel to change. I looked in the mirror at my upper body. I look at the dozens of scars on my chest, abdomen, shoulders, and back. I turn around when I hear a gasp.

"Nadia, what are you doing in here?"

"Jay asked me to find out where you are? Are those all from war?"

"Nadia, I like you, but I really don't want to talk about this so could you tell Jay that I'll be out in one minute."

She looks at me funny and walks close to me. "You like me?"

"Well yeah, but I would really like to have this conversation when I am fully clothed."

"I don't mind."

"Uh, well, uh, I-I-" I didn't even finish my sentence because she leaned in and kissed me. I was surprised and I didn't know what to do so I just stood still. She pulls back and crosses her arms.

"So you like me, but you won't kiss me?"

"No it's not that. I like you, I really do, but I would really like to explain all of this later after work. I promise it won't sound weird. How about I take you to dinner tonight?"

"Ok. I am staying at Erin's so I'll text her address to you. Pick me up at 8?"

"Ok. See you at 8." She turns around and walks to the door. She turns back and smiles at me. When she leaves, I slump against the lockers hitting my head. I then get dressed and walk into the break room to get my coffee. I am approached by a 5 foot something devil burning a hole into my head with her eyes.

"So I hear you have a date?" Erin asks.

"What's it to you Lindsay?"

"I just wanted to apologize for the way I acted yesterday. I know what it's like to be barred from someone and I can't believe I did that to you. It's just that Nadia is really working hard; I don't want her to fail."

"I get that Lindsay, but I am not trying to take advantage of her. She seems sweet and really beautiful, so I want to take her to dinner."

"I am trying to believe you."

"Ok. Lindsay here is a secret only my brother knows." I walk up to the door and close it. I turn a face her. "I have a lot of firsts. One, I haven't had my first kiss. And two, I am a virgin. So I would not be doing this unless I really liked her."

She was shocked. I mean, mouth open shocked. "Ok. I believe you, but if you break her heart, I break you."

Just before she opens the door, I say, "Wait." She turns around. "When are you and my brother going to get together? Do not try to deny it because I am sure you both give each other a million looks even when doing just paperwork."

"Ok. One, don't talk about us and two Voight has rules. No in house dating."

"Rules are meant to be broken." And I just walk out and head to my desk. I open my drawer to find my dog tags and take them out. I look at each one and put them in a stack and kiss them before putting them all back in the drawer. Ruzek must have seen that.

"So why do you do that?" He asked.

I turn to him. "These seven soldiers were my family." And I just turned back. I caught Jay's face and could see he knew what I am talking about.

Voight walked out and started giving details on the case. Apparently some group decided to steal a piece of evidence linking to a murder, which would release the suspect. "Halstead, I want you partnered with Raghu on this one. Lindsay, you're with Dawson. I want this done fast and clean. That means by midnight today the 21st, this case should be wrapped." He walks back into his office.

I look at Jay. "I'm sorry did he just say it was the 21st?"

"Yep." Jay replied popping the 'p'.

Erin was confused. "Usually comes after the 20th. Thought you knew that much. Why what's on the 21st?"

"Nothing. Just-" Jay began, but I cut him off.

"Jay!" I yelled. He looked at me and I shook my head slowly to say no. He understood and he kept quiet. I went back to my paperwork despite the looks from everyone else in the room.

Erin walked up to my desk. "What is your problem with me?"

"What?"

"Why did you scream like that? You don't want to say some thing that's fine, but do not try to control him."

"Lindsay." Jay says.

"No I want to know. What is today?"

"Lindsay." Antonio says.

"No I want to know. WHAT IS TODAY?"

I jump out of my chair making it hit Adam's desk behind me and look straight into Lindsay's eyes, her not backing down. Jay gets up and pulls me away. "Hey my CI has some info. Let's go check it out." I keep my eyes on Lindsay and then look at Jay. A tear escaped my eye and just before I tried to remove it, Jay did. Lindsay saw it, but didn't know what to do. Jay and I walk out of the district.

 **Jay POV**

I know what today is. It's not a good day. And I really didn't appreciate Lindsay pushing Akhil's buttons to speak to her. I am going to have a talk with her later. Before we could meet the CI, Voight called us to meet him at a location. They got the suspect and then set up a meet to lure Bembenek and his brother out.

We arrive at the meet and wait for Bembenek. He arrives and just as he is about to shoot someone, we jump in. Bembenek tried to get away, but Akhil and I got the jump on him. Bembenek's brother jumped out and walked toward us. When he pulled a gun, I screamed "Gun". The next thing I know Bembenek's brother has two bullet holes in his chest.

 _That's weird, I only shot once._ I turned my head to see Akhil's gun smoking as well. We both approached Bembenek's brother as Al arrested Bembenek. Bembenek was screaming on his way down.

"You're dead. They both of you, you're dead." Akhil walks up to him and looks him dead in the eye and then puts him in the police cruiser. He then walks up to me.

"You good?" He asked.

"Yeah, just wish I didn't have to pull the trigger."

"Hey, it was either him or you and no matter how much of an as you are, I choose you. Now come one, looks like I have a date to get ready for."

"Wait what?"

"Oh yeah, I am going on my first date tonight with Nadia."

"Well, congrats and good luck."

"I need some advise though. Two pieces of advise actually."

"Sure what's up?"

"Do I take the bike, or can I borrow your car?"

"Take the car. This is a formal date, so a car would be appropriate."

"Ok, no bike then."

"What was the other thing?"

"Why does Lindsay hate me? I am really trying to understand whether its my fault, but I don't."

"Don't worry. It's probably because of Nadia. Voight raised her, so she probably is protective of her just like he is. I'll talk to her."

"Thanks. Now come one, we need to get out of here."

"Damn straight."


	5. Chapter 4: First Time For Everything

Chapter 4: First Time For Everything

 **Akhil POV**

I walked up to Erin's apartment. I was very nervous for tonight. Give me a break, this is my first date.

I knocked on Erin's door three times and heard footsteps coming closer to the door. The door opened to reveal Erin looking down at her feet.

"Hey Akhil, come on in." I walked into her apartment. It was nice and bigger than Jay's.

"So I wanted to apologize for today." She starts after closing the door. "I don't know what came over me. Jay told me that this day is something hard for you two and I didn't realize that. So sorry."

"Actually, you don't have to apologize. Jay told me that Voight raised you and that you are very protective of Nadia. I don't mind that. I actually envy that. I wish I had someone who looked out for me the way you look out for her, so I guess I am trying to say sorry for not understanding."

"Well, this is awkward." The voice was Nadia's. She wore a beautiful summer dress that made my casual suit look like a piece of shit.

"Wow Nadia, you look great." I tried to not sound like a teenager, but I couldn't help it. First date you know.

"Ok. I want her back by midnight and no funny business you two."

"Oh my god. Erin shut up." Nadia laughed.

"I will have her back by midnight and I promise no funny business." Akhil said while trying to keep a straight face.

"Ok. Have fun guys."

We walked downstairs and to the car.

"Where is the bike?"

"Oh, Jay suggested a car."

"Why did you listen to Jay?"

I looked at my feet and said, "Because this is my first date."

"This is your first date?"

"Yeah."

"And that kiss in the locker room…"

"Was my first kiss. That's why I didn't react; I didn't know what to do. Pretty lame huh?"

"No actually I think its sweet, but why wait so long?"

"In high school, I played football and was a part of the marching band. So I had a choice be popular or be myself. I decided to be myself, but some people didn't like that. There was a girl who I liked. She invited me once to this party where all of the popular kids where playing spin the bottle, except we had to kiss in the closet. So I spin and it happens to fall on the girl I like. Just imagine how I felt. I go to the closet, close door and turn off the lights. Next thing I know something is on my lips, but it took me a couple of second to figure out it was not a pair of lips. I turned on the light and there she was with a pig in her hand and a camera in the other. I was so embarrassed; I left immediately and went home. Everyone in school called me piglet until I graduated. Since then it was hard to know who was really my friend, so I stuck to myself mostly and I promised myself that I would never fall for a girl unless I feel like she is the one."

 **Nadia POV**

I just stood there stunned. Never did I imagine a guy like him being treated like that.

"Wow, I'm so sorry that happened."

"It wasn't your fault. I just wished I wasn't that stupid back then."

"You are not stupid and any girl would be lucky to have you."

"Thanks."

"So you think I'm the one?"

He looked down at his shoes again. I could tell he was blushing.

"To be honest I don't know. There is just something about you that makes me feel different."

I had to turn away because my face was so red. Never have I felt this way before and been with a guy who really wanted to feel this way about me.

We got in the car and listened to some nice music. For a guy, he has a nice taste in music.

"So, how did you create this wonderful playlist?"

"I was in band in school. I loved music. It was one way to express myself. Whether it was old school hip-hop or straight up classical, I knew how to say what's on my mind with each note."

We talked some more about who we were and how we changed for the better. We came to the restaurant. It looked a bit fancy and expensive. We sat down, had a nice Italian dinner, and then took a walk on the boardwalk. We then sat at the pier under the moonlight waiting for the clock to strike 12.

He looked over to me and smiled. "You know, I wish this night would never end."

"Yeah me too."

It was getting late and we had to be home before Erin went crazy. He walked me upstairs and said good night. Just as he was about to leave I grabbed his hand and pulled him close to me.

"Lesson number one. Always kiss the girl good night."

He closed the distance and brought his lips onto mine. He waited for me to deepen the kiss, so when I did he just fell into rhythm. Both of us were out of breath when we pulled apart. He looked straight in my eyes and I had this weird feeling in the stomach like butterflies.

He spoke first. "Best first kiss ever."

I laughed so hard with my back against the wall. He watch alarm went off and that signaled it was midnight. I opened the door and said good night. He kissed me once more before saying good night and walking back to his car. After I closed the door, I waited for his car to leave. I could hear him shout, "Woohoo," and that just made me laugh and squeal like I was back in high school.

"So, how was your date?" Erin came out of her bedroom and sat on the couch.

"Amazing. Did you know that was his first date and first kiss?"

"Actually yes. The only way I was convinced that he wasn't going to take advantage of you was because of that."

"I am still mad at you about that. Do you know how sweet he his? He took me to dinner, then for a nice walk, and finally just to sit under the stars. I don't want to go too fast, but I hope this really works out."

"I'm happy for you Nadia. I really am."

 **Jay POV**

"Come on, where are you?" I keep saying that every five minutes. I want to know how he was. I missed too much of his life to not be there now.

I heard the door unlock and he came into the apartment. He looked at me, smiled and took a beer from the fridge.

"So how did it go?"

"I really am glad I waited. It was amazing. I never thought a girl could make me feel like this."

"That's good. Now-"

"Shush." Akhil interrupted me. He leaned close towards the hallway. Suddenly he leapt to me saying "Get down." Bullets flied everywhere through my front door, making me curl up in a ball under Akhil. Once I heard footsteps running away from the apartment, I looked up.

"Alright Akhil get off me." He didn't answer. "Akhil?" I pushed him off me to find two bullet holes in his abdomen. "No, no, no. AKHIL?"

"Hey don't scream." He coughed.

"Oh thank god." I called 911 and surprisingly Ambulance 61 was sent. Gabby saw my brother and then me. "He's my brother. He's got two shots to the lower right abdomen."

"Ok Jay, you have to let us take care of him."

We arrived at Chicago Med 10 minutes later. He was saying he didn't need to, seeing it was through and through. I got pissed.

"Shut up. Shut. Up. You are at Med and Will is going to look over you."

They roll him into the ER and I see Will on the side. I grab him by the collar. He looks at me scared because of the blood on my shirt.

"It's Akhil."

I didn't need to say anything more. We ran to the room and opened the curtain. Rhodes was in there saying he needs surgery because the bullet nicked an artery. We saw him rolled off into the elevator and just stood there.

Will spoke first. "How long has he been here?"

"Couple of days. Almost a week actually"

"WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME?"

"BECAUSE WE LEFT HIM. NOT JUST ME, YOU TOO. YOU WERE OFF PARTYING AND I WAS OFF DOING GOD KNOWS WHAT. WE LEFT OUR BABY BROTHER!"

"GUYS!" Natalie was behind Will. "You need to go to the waiting room and keep your voices down."

After we went I called Erin and she came in what felt like 2 seconds. Nadia was right behind her.

"What happened?" Nadia asked.

"He came home and then noticed someone was outside our apartment. He went to check it out, but then he jumped and pushed me down while landing on top of me. He saved my life. Those two bullets would have gone into my heart if he didn't jump."

2 hours later, Erin was at my side asleep on my shoulder and Nadia was on the other shoulder. I was just about to fall asleep when Rhodes came into the room. I stood up, almost making Erin and Nadia fall. Will and I ran over to him.

"He's fine. We fixed the arterial bleed and sutured him up. He's in his room now. Come on." All of us were on Rhodes heels when we finally came to his room. We could hear the machines beeping loudly and Rhodes calling for a nurse. We opened the door, and the scene in front of us was completely ridiculous.

There he was standing in the middle of the room putting his pants on after removing all of the wires and the IV from his hand. He turned around and we all saw his scars. I flinched at the thought of what happened to him out there. He turned around and saw us and before he could put his shirt on, Nadia ran over to him and hugged him like she was never letting go. He winced a little, but hugged her back.

"What the hell are you doing?" We were all so caught up that we didn't notice the rest of intelligence in the room. Voight was pissed.

"What does it look like? I am going to find out who shot me."

Rhodes was shocked. "You just had surgery. It will take days for you to get better. You need bed rest for at least a week."

"Yeah not happening." Will and I actually smirked at that comment. Everyone looked at us.

"What?" I said.

"He's definitely a Halstead." Said Erin.

 **Third POV**

Will walked up and hugged Akhil just like Nadia did. Then came Jay, and the three brothers just stood there. Anyone else would have cried at the scene, hell Erin and Nadia were, but these boys rarely showed any pain.

Alvin decided to break the silence. "So we know who did this."

All three looked up, and while Akhil was in pain, he could tell that whoever shot him will not live past 24 hours from now.

"Who?" he asked.

"Bembenek put out a bounty on both of your heads for $100,000 each."

Akhil looked at Alvin and started to laugh. He put on his shirt while everyone once again thought he was crazy. He looked at them. "What? $100,000. I should kill myself."

Everyone looked at him angrily, but the one person who was severely pissed was Nadia.

"What the hell? You are an idiot. And why the hell did you jump in front of the bullets?"

Akhil looked at her and then the rest of the team. "I already told you. Code number one. However, its time for Code number 2: you touch my loved ones, I hunt you down." He put on his shirt and then leather jacket, signed the release papers, and walked out of the hospital. Everyone met at the district. Once everyone was in the Akhil turned to Jay.

"I want to know who helped."

Jay was confused. "What do you mean?"

"I mean that we arrested Bembenek no less than 6 hours before I was shot. I want to know how he could have known where you lived that quickly. 6 hours to get arrested, then arraigned, and then sent to jail. How the hell did he send out the hit?"

Everyone including Voight was shocked. No one thought of that, but Voight decided to speak.

"Raghu, we are going to catch this guy. Until then I need you and Halstead to go somewhere and rest."

"Like hell. He shot my brother and I am not going to sit out." Jay replied. I stood next to him in agreement.

"Well then, seeing as you wont take my friendly advice, here are your orders. Lindsay, take these two to your apartment for tonight. I will not see both of them until 11 am at the earliest, do I make myself clear?"

"Yes Sargent." Lindsay said with an apologetic look to Jay.

Voight walked up to Jay. "Just because you are going to her apartment, it doesn't give you the pass to do anything." He growled up in Jay's face. This didn't fly with Akhil.

"Um Sargent?"

"Yes, Raghu?" Voight didn't take his eyes of Halstead.

"Back up right now." That got his attention.

"What did you say to me?"

"I said 'Back up right now'." Jay looked surprised. No one ever called out Voight, especially when it came to Erin.

Now Voight was in my face. "You wanna go back to the hospital, kid?"

Akhil looks at Jay. "Is he threatening me?" Now he looks to Voight and takes a step closer. "Are you threatening me?"

"Sarge, I'm gonna take Akhil home before he does something stupid. He's high on those pain meds now. He can't think straight." Jay was making up almost every excuse to leave.

"You're right Jay. Take him home. I'll speak to both of you in my office at 11:30 tomorrow. Go home."

Erin, Nadia, Jay, and Akhil walked out of the district. Jay put his arm on Akhil and stopped him.

"What was that?" Jay asked.

"What was what?" Akhil asked in return.

"Don't play dumb. Why did you speak to Voight like that?"

"Because I am entitled to exercise the First Amendment of the Constitution, Freedom of Speech. And plus, it was a disagreement."

"There is disagreeing and there is flat out insubordination. What you did was exactly that."

"I'm sorry are we clocked in?"

"No."

"Does that mean he's my boss at the instant?"

"No."

"So whom am I being insubordinate to?"

Jay paused, then smiled. "I'm glad you are my brother. Come on lets go."

They stopped by the apartment to pick up their clothes for the night. Erin and Jay cleared the room. Akhil forgot his gun at home after putting it in the gun safe. Akhil went to his room and got his bag. He was taking a long time so Jay walked in to help him. He found him sitting on the bed crying while looking at a picture. It was of him and Ben Corson. They were friends in school before he was killed.

"He would have been 23 today." Akhil cried. Jay sat down and held his brother while he cried.

Erin and Nadia could hear his sobs from outside in the living room. Their hearts broke at the sound. They went to check on them after the sound slowly quieted down. Erin and Nadia walked to the room to find Jay cradling his brother in his arms. Akhil was fast asleep and Jay was singing Right Here Waiting by Richard Marx. Jay looked and saw Erin and Nadia.

"I used to sing to him when he cried. He'd fall asleep right on the spot. Nadia, can you stay here with him for a few minutes. I need to talk to Erin."

"Of course."

Jay put him on the bed and walked out. Before closing the door, he saw Nadia next to Akhil. She was singing him a lullaby and moving her hand through his hair. He turned into her and held onto her, just like he did with their mother. Jay closed the door and walked to the sofa in the living room.

"So what did you want to talk about?"

"Ben Corson was my ex-girlfriend's brother. While Ally and I were dating, Ben and Akhil would hang out. They went to movies and skateboarding. They did almost everything together, and Ally and I used to watch them. We even took them on some of our dates, just because we felt so good when they were around."

Jay stopped and looked at Erin. "He was murdered today 8 years ago by a pedophile whose father alibied him out. That's why we were out of it today."

"Jay, I'm so sorry." She took his hand in hers and leaned against his shoulders.

He looked into her eyes. "I almost lost him today."

She hugged him tightly. She had never seen her partner this vulnerable. It made her heart ache.

After a few minutes of silence, Erin finally spoke. "Why don't we go now? Nadia and I will sleep in my room and you and Akhil can sleep in Nadia's room."

"Ok. Let me go wake him up."

"And Jay?"

"Yeah."

"I'm sorry for the way I acted with your brother. He is a nice person and he didn't deserve my attitude."

"It's fine. He gets it. I think he only gets it because he didn't have it. And that's both Will's fault, and mine but we are changing that. I'm gonna get a better place and we are going to take care of him."

Jay went and woke up Akhil. He was still sleepy and not fully awake, so Jay made Akhil lean onto him as they walked with his bag to Erin's car. They reached her apartment and fell asleep in Nadia's room instantly.


	6. Chapter 5: War Changes Us All

Chapter 5: War Changes Us All

Jay woke up that night to after someone shifted on Nadia's bed. He looked over to see his brother shaking, moving his head from side to side saying, "No. Come back. Come back."

Jay tried to wake him up by calling his name, but it only made Akhil move more violently. Having some experience on dealing with PTSD, Jay slapped him, causing Akhil's eyes to open. The next thing Jay knows is that he is flipped over on the bed with Akhil's right hand on his neck and left hand reaching for his imaginary knife in his boot. Instantly, Akhil took his hands off and crawled away, after realizing what he had done. He got out of the bed, got his phone and earphones, took his jump rope from his bag, and got out of the building, leaving Jay to wonder what the hell just happened.

Nadia heard the commotion and saw Akhil leaving the apartment. She got up and went after him, silently just to see what he was doing. He went to the parking lot, put his earphones in and attached it to his phone, increased the volume so that she could hear it clearly, and started jump roping.

He was furiously working out, doing all kinds of tricks. Thirty minutes later, his shirt was drenched with sweat, so he took it off. The lights in the parking lot were on, so she could see his back clearly. The scars were there. They weren't long ones, they were short, and there were too many for her to count while he was working out. She could see his ripped back muscles moving with his arms as he brought the jump rope up and down over his head. Ten minutes later he just stopped and threw his rope to the ground. He bent down, stretched, and then did 50 push-ups. Looking at her watch, Nadia saw that it was 3:30 AM. After his push ups he just stopped and turned over onto his back. He just lay there looking at the clear sky and full moon.

 **Nadia POV**

I slowly waked up to him and sat down beside him. He noticed I was there, but didn't look at me. I was about to say something, but he beat me to it.

"You know, my brothers left me. My mother died. My dad was an asshole. And me," he scoffed, "well I am just a failure. I tried my best to make sure my family was proud of me. I got good grades, played sports, didn't drink underage, didn't break and rules or laws. I just did my duty and lived my life the best I could. But to this day, I can never understand why? I looked so many times at a sky like this and wondered 'Is it me?' Did I do something? It took me almost an entire year to give up on Jay and my family, but I always wondered why?"

Nadia looked at him. "I get it. I always wonder that too. My family never understood me. I had an abusive and alcoholic father and a neglectful mother who was a drug addict. I ran away when I was 14 and lived on the streets ever since. Never heard from them, never looked back."

Akhil looked at me with a face different from everyone else when I told them about me. It wasn't pity or guilt, it was just comforting. I closed the gap between us and kissed him softly.

"Come on. Lets go back to sleep."

We went back to the apartment and walked to the couch. I gave him a glass of water and then told him where the bathroom was. After his shower, he came out and sat on the couch next to me. Next thing I know, we are passed out on the couch with him holding me.

 **Erin POV**

I woke up to my alarm going off at 6:30. I went to the kitchen to see Jay with a fresh pot of coffee and leaning on the counter. I smile at him and take a cup for myself. I then follow his gaze to the couch where Akhil and Nadia were fast asleep. She placed her head on his chest and put an arm around him, while he held her like he was protecting her. _This might no be so bad after all_.

Jay spoke first. "I couldn't wake them up. They look so peaceful."

"Yeah they do."

"So when are we going to do that?"

I look at him and waited for a sarcastic comment or for him to say he was joking, but he wasn't. He was completely serious. His eyes were on mine and he was so freaking gorgeous. Why was he so gorgeous? And Voight wouldn't approve of it, but this felt so right. He saw the hesitation and I guess my silence kind of gave him his answer. He turned away, but I stopped him. I took his face in my hands and brought him closer, until his lips were on mine. It was a soft and gentle kiss. I pulled away to breathe and looked at him.

"We can start now." He smiled when I said that. "Let's talk about this later."

"About damn time." Akhil and Nadia were awake and walking to the kitchen. Nadia raised her eyebrow at me and I failed miserably to hide my blush.

"Shut up Akhil." Jay says.

"Hey, don't worry about me. I've been here for what about a week and I could tell there was something between you two."

"Damn. You've been here a week and have managed to save my life twice, get shot, get a bounty on your head, jump out of a burning building, and almost die." Jay says almost with guilt.

"Hey, I've been through worse."

I look at Akhil. The way he carries himself to be this strong person who can rarely ever break, but then again I've only known him for a week. This just adds to the mystery of who Akhil is.

/

It's been a couple of weeks since Akhil came into the unit. Jay and I started dating secretly. The only two people who knew where Akhil and Nadia. Akhil and Nadia were taking things slow. They would go on a date once a week, but hang out almost every single day either at Jay's or mine. The rule about in house dating applied to all of us. It was made clear the day after Akhil got shot and we got back to work.

 _Flashback:_

 _We were driving to the precinct. It was just Nadia and I. Jay drove his car and Akhil wanted to ride his bike. I swear he loves that bike more than anything. I pulled into the parking lot to see Jay waiting by his car. We got out and heard a motorcycle approaching. Akhil parked his bike, and winced when he got off. We all noticed, but we knew better than to argue with him. I swear he acts like a 5 year old on a sugar rush._

 _We walked into Intelligence and Voight stood at his door. He called Jay and Akhil into his office. Nadia and I looked at each other before settling down._

 _ **Akhil POV**_

 _I walked into his office next to Jay. We both stood at attention like we were back in the military. Voight looked at us and then laughed. "At ease guys. Sit down."_

" _Now I know you were shot Akhil, and I know it was a time you needed to heal, but I don't approve in house relationships. It's something that distracts people and I don't want that in my unit. Nadia and Erin are off limits."_

 _I looked at him before I answered, "Wow."_

" _What Akhil means is that he will not break one of your rules. He wants to be in Intelligence, just like me." Jay says._

" _Is that true, Akhil?" Voight asks._

" _Yes, sir." I respond._

" _Ok. Halstead, you're dismissed."_

 _Jay gets up and leaves the room closing the door. Voight gets up and sits on his desk in front of me._

" _If you ever speak to me the way you did last night again, I'll have your ass handing out parking tickets for the rest of your life."_

 _I didn't back down. I just looked into his eyes and didn't say anything._

" _With that being said, I'm sorry."_

" _Say what?"_

" _I am apologizing. Something I don't do often. I knew Jay liked Erin since his first day here, but I will not allow him to take advantage of her."_

" _Hold up. Who said he's taking advantage of her. They have been nothing but respectful of your rules."_

" _Ok. So there is nothing to worry about."_

" _Nada."_

" _Ok. You are dismissed."_

 _I walk out to my desk and wink at Nadia on my way there. Erin catches it and raises her eyebrow. I wink at her too, making her and Jay laugh._

 _I start to think to myself. 'Maybe its not so bad. Maybe second chances do exist.'_

 **Erin POV**

It wasn't easy to keep our relationships a secret. Jay and I almost got caught in the locker room.

 _We were making out while the team was following up a lead. No one knows how Akhil knew we were in there, but he cam running in, pushed me away from Jay and flipped him over._

" _Akhil what the hell?!" I screamed._

 _Antonio came in a few seconds later to get his water bottle and I look back at Akhil._

" _What's going on here?" Antonio asked._

" _Just showing my brother what I learned." Akhil responded._

 _Akhil looked at me after speaking to Jay and I just looked away to Antonio who was on his way out. Akhil helped Jay up._

" _That's what happens when you let your guard down Jay. Bro, I'm sorry for that, it's just Antonio was here and asking where you were and I just panicked when I didn't see both of you in the bullpen."_

 _I stepped in a hugged Akhil. "Thanks."_

 _He walked out and I stood there red faced in front of Jay. He looks at me, kisses me quickly, then heads back to the bullpen._

Nadia and Akhil almost got caught too. It wasn't an intimate moment. It was when we had to send Nadia undercover for a meet with a drug lord as a prostitute. When Voight suggested, Nadia said yes, and Akhil was more than pissed.

" _We have an idea to send you for the meet. You will wear a wire and when he gives you the drugs, we will come in."_

 _I looked over at Akhil and he looked at me with the same amount of concern for Nadia, maybe even more. He walked off to the locker room. Nadia saw that and she walked in after him. Jay and I were worried so we stayed out of the locker room, but stood by the door. We could hear everything._

 _ **Nadia POV**_

 _I walked in to see him leaning on top of the sink grabbing both sides with his knuckles turning white. I walk up behind him, slowly to not startle him. I want to say something, but he beat me to it._

" _Why? Why you?"_

" _I can handle it."_

" _You shouldn't have to. Not after what you've been through." He turned around and hugged me. "I can't lose you."_

 _I tried to keep myself from crying, but I failed. I looked into his eyes and told him, "I am not going anywhere. It's a small op. I go in and then come right back out."_

 _He just looked at me. This feeling inside was different. It came every time he looked at me like this. I took his face in my hands and kissed him hard. After pulling back out of breath, I say the one thing I have never said before._

" _I love you."_

 _ **Erin POV**_

 _I saw Voight coming towards the locker room and pulled Jay inside there with me. Nadia and Akhil were hugging, but Voight was really close so I pulled Nadia away and began talking while Jay started getting Akhil ready for the op. Voight walked in to see Nadia and me on the right side of the lockers and Akhil and Jay on the left side. He walked back out saying that we are leaving in 15 minutes._

 _We all looked at each other and burst out laughing. Akhil spoke first._

" _Well, glad we are looking out for each other."_

 _We got ready and went to the basement for the op. Right before we dropped Nadia, we took her to the side and made sure she got everything right. After she left, Akhil and Jay were supposed to pose as customers at the bar before she was picked up._

 _The op went sideways. She gave the word when the drugs were given and we entered the building. We went in and Akhil was looking for her. We found her in the corner of a room talking to Akhil._

" _They made me do it. I'm sorry."_

" _Shhh. Don't apologize. Lets go." He picked her up bridal style and took her to the car so she could get checked at Chicago Med. She was cleared and the drugs were out of her system in a few days._

/

 **Third POV**

Voight had a feeling that things have changed among Erin, Nadia, Jay, and Akhil since the bounty. They all seemed closer to each other. He knew that Erin and Jay were seeing each other, but he waited for them to come tell him. He trusts Erin and knows that if she lets him all the way in, she will be happy. As for Akhil and Nadia, that was a no brainer. First there was the hugging when he was shot, and then the op when he took care of her. He was against in house relationships, but these two couples looked like they were happy. He was going to wait for them to come and tell him, because he has learnt to trust Akhil and Nadia. So lets see where that takes them?


	7. Chapter 6: Sick Days

Chapter 6: Sick Days

 **Jay POV**

Six months. It's been six months since Akhil joined our unit. I finally got a handle of his schedule. He gets up at 5:30 in the morning, goes for an hour run, and gets to Antonio's gym with his clothes and etc. for the day, stays there until 8 and is in the bullpen by 8:30. He's usually the second person here, the first being Voight. So when I came in today to find everyone here except for Akhil, I was shocked. Voight walked out into the bullpen.

"Raghu is sick today, so Dawson you're with me."

I looked at Erin and Nadia. We four hung out last night and know Akhil for sure wasn't sick. I tried to figure it out all day. I was just staring at the whiteboard while we were going over the case. Voight pulled me out of my daze.

"HALSTEAD, LINDSAY MY OFFICE!"

We both walked in and closed the door.

"I want you guys to do some surveillance on this guy. We need evidence, and we need it fast."

Erin responds, "On it."

"And Halstead," Voight speak much calmer than before, "I need the evidence in a couple hours so if you guys, I don't know, take a detour on your way there past your apartment, I wouldn't mind."

I looked at him and thanked him with a nod. We got in the car and headed to my place. The door was slightly open with a crack just enough to fit our finger through. We heard punches coming through the apartment and quickly drew out our guns. We walked in slowly in the direction of the punches. I opened the door to find Akhil punching our punch bag in the room. He only had a pair of sweatpants on and was drenched in sweat. Each punch made his sweat fall onto the floor. I slowly walked up to him and put my hand on his back, only to find him turn quickly and face me in his stance. He saw both Erin and me and backed off.

"What are you doing here?"

I respond, "Checking up on you. I heard you were sick."

"Yeah I am. So leave."

"What's going on man?"

He looked at me like I punched him in the gut.

"The date."

"May 5th. What about it?"

"Huh, I knew you would forget. That's why I called in sick. Didn't want to punch you in the face."

"What happened?"

"Two things happened on this day. One, you left. This was the first day you didn't come back home after Mom died."

I looked at him with regret. I was about to say something, until he spoke again.

"And two, as of 10:15 this morning, I turned 24." He punched the bag so hard; it actually fell off the chain. "I'll clean that up."

"I'm sorry I can't believe I forgot."

"Yeah well I'm used to it now. Could you please leave? I'm trying to imagine the bag is your face, but you being here is tempting me so much." He says sarcastically.

"Ok, we will leave. Come on Erin."

We leave and get in Erin's car. After five minutes Erin speaks.

"You need to fix this. His whole family has forgot that boy. He admitted that he stepped into crossfire to take the pain away. You need to take his pain away. Both of you. Tonight, I am dropping you off and I am taking Nadia out for dinner. Fix this Jay. You need this."

I listen to what she says and take a deep breath. "The morning Jules died, I had a feeling. A feeling that meant something bad was going to happen. I used to have that feeling overseas. I was supposed to determine whether we could successfully complete the op. I just wish I did the same here."

"Jay you know Jules dying was not your fault. It wasn't any one of ours fault. It was Pulpo's and he is in prison for it now."

We came up to the surveillance point and waited. I've been thinking about Erin and I and I just wanted to talk about us.

"So, can we tell Voight?"

She looks at me like I am out of my mind.

"What?"

"I mean this relationship between us has been going really good so far. I really want to do more though. I want to take you on dates to either a restaurant or a movie, I wanna go on walks with you, and I want to take you to Wisconsin."

She looked at me then to the window. "Let me think about it." She must have seen my face because she immediately turned me around to her.

"I mean, I want those things too. I want to be with you, all in, and it's not about my job. It's about Voight himself. I have never broken his rules and I have never disrespected him. That does not change the way I feel about you. We will tell him, in time."

/

 **Third POV**

The case was solved by night and Voight told everyone to go home at 7. Jay walked into his apartment to find Akhil holding a photo frame. He sat next to him on the couch and saw that it was a family picture without their dad. Their mom, Jay, Will, and Akhil all on his 15th birthday at the pier. Akhil was in the middle with their mom on the left and Will on the right. Jay was behind Akhil on his back. The apartment door opened and Will walked in with a birthday cake and a couple of beers. Akhil looked up and smiled at his brothers.

"You really didn't think we forgot our brother's birthday did you?" Will asked.

He put the numbers 2 and 4 on the cake and lit the candles. Akhil made a wish and cut the cake. The door opened again and Erin and Nadia came in. They both wished Akhil and took a beer. Will sat on the single couch with Jay on the bigger couch and Erin next to him. Akhil sat on the floor in front of jay leaning against his legs and Nadia sat next to him.

Akhil broke the silence first. "You know, she always yelled at us at one thing."

Will raised his eyebrows. "What?"

"Fighting and not just fighting in general, but fighting amongst ourselves. It meant everything, bickering, jokes, and all the good stuff. Bet she'd be really proud now though." He scoffed.

Erin spoke next, "I don't know a lot about you guys, but I do know that you would turn this world inside out to protect each other. You love each other more than anyone else even if you are too stubborn to admit it."

Nadia kissed Akhil and rested her head on his shoulder. "I wish I could have met her," she said.

Akhil turned to her. "She would have loved you, even you Lindsay." That earned him a kick to his shoulder. "No seriously. She would have threatened us if we ever hurt you guys. She was just that kind of mother. A protective, kind, and smart woman."

Erin turned to Will. "So Will, where's Nat?"

"I don't know. She's somewhere," He scoffed.

"Wait, whose Nat?" Akhil asked.

"She's no one. She's a doctor at the hospital." He answered.

"Oh I thought she was a doctor at the precinct." Jay rebutted. He and Akhil gave a high five and laughed but soon stopped when Will got up. Akhil was worried.

"Hey, what's wrong? She hurt you?" Jay asked.

"No, it's just… she's not who I thought she was. I really liked her, but I caught her sleeping with another man. Clark to be exact."

"Wait so let me get this straight. You help her. You are there for her baby and she does this."

Akhil stepped in. "Wait hold up, you stayed loyal to one girl?"

"Yeah why is that so hard to believe?" 

"Are you kidding me? High school? College? Boston? New York? You want me to keep going?"

"Alright I get it."

"Doesn't make what she did right though. I'm sorry man."

Will just looked down at his feet. Akhil saw how this really hurt Will and an idea popped into his head. "Let's go to the field."

Jay and Will looked at him. "What now?"

"Yeah. Come on Nadia."

Akhil went to his room and changed into a pair of jeans, a white Henley, and wore his light brown leather jacket. He walked out and took his bike keys and helmet. Erin, Jay, and Will came in Jay's car while Akhil and Nadia rode the motorcycle. They stopped at a high school 20 minutes away form the apartment. They got down and walked to the football field next to the school. Akhil and Jay went to turn on the lights, while Will, Erin, and Nadia stayed on the field. The lights turned on one by one and the banners came into view. They had a banner for each player that made all state from their school. When the last light turned on, the last four came into view. They were all of Akhil, but the one difference was that it said national as well.

"Welcome to Maury Field." Akhil's voice boomed over the field. They all laughed as he tried to make a Voight impression.

Akhil and Jay came down to the middle of the field. They brought blankets and pillows, so they just sat under the stars. Jay spoke after a long time.

"You know, this field has helped us in so many ways. I came out here and decided I wanted to enlist."

Will spoke next. "I came out here and decided I wanted to be a doctor. Not because of dad, but because of me. I wanted to save people."

Akhil was silent for some more time and then spoke. "I came out here and discovered what it means to live. Yeah I played football and could have gone to college for it, but I would just be a dead person walking around. My heart was in fighting for me. Whether it was my life, my passion, or my family, I never wanted to give up. I thought the Rangers could give me that, so I joined. It was 1 day before graduation when I made up my mind. Dad was so pissed, but mom supported me the entire time."

That field was where everything important to them happened, but no one knew what was going on inside Akhil's head right then. They didn't know what he was thinking as he looked down and watched Nadia peacefully resting on his chest. They didn't know that he could feel himself falling in love with her.


	8. Chapter 7: The Truth Sets You Free

Chapter 7: The Truth Sets You Free

They all went back to work the next day. The next few weeks were slow. Only a couple of cases came in and they weren't that bad, mostly surveillance and gathering evidence type. Erin and Jay would always steal glances at each other and they weren't very secretive. Voight looked like he knew what was going on. Akhil and Nadia were lucky since their desks were away from his office and they could look at each other all day without getting caught.

One day, they all were getting coffee in the break room and just talking. Akhil with Nadia and Erin with Jay. Jay walked out first and they heard Voight's voice.

"Hey how's it going?"

Jay looked at him for a moment and then replied, "Good."

He sat down at his desk while smiling at Voight. Lindsay walked out rolling her eyes.

"How's the coffee?" Voight asked.

"It's delicious." She replied.

"Glad to hear it."

Akhil and Nadia looked at each other. Nadia walked out first. Voight didn't say anything, so Akhil thought he was in the all clear. Too bad he was wrong.

"Raghu."

"Yes, Sarge."

"If I had a heart attack and went to the hospital, and the doctor told me that it was mild and nothing to worry about, but he tells me that I should stop drinking coffee with creamer because it one of the root causes, but I do it anyway knowing that it was going to kill me, what would you say?"

You could hear a pin drop. Everyone was looking at Akhil and Jay almost spit his coffee out when he heard the 'kill' part. Akhil found it amusing and looked Voight in the eye.

"Well, you know my background. You know that I spent years getting shot at by people I didn't know to save even more people I didn't know. I could have died then, but I didn't. We die when we have to Sarge. So I say screw it, get a new bottle of creamer and drink all the coffee you want."

Voight jus looked at him, almost like he was dumbfounded. He then smiles and said, "Good answer. Always fight for what you think is right kid, no matter what the consequences may be." He said that last part looking at Erin who hid behind her computer.

Akhil looked at Jay and winked at him. Jay just grinned and got back to his paperwork. Ruzek and Atwater walked up to Voight. Ruzek spoke first.

"Hey Boss, so either Kevin or I have go to the training course for the new Penlink software."

"Uh-huh. What's Penlink?"

Atwater speaks, "It's, uh, well we don't know."

"Which conveniently bring me to our next point. Respectfully, I know things didn't work out with Jin. You have some trust issues with the tech position, but I maybe went to two or three computer courses at the academy."

"I mean if you need mic somebody or hook up an X-Box, we're your guys." Atwater says.

"We just aren't cut out for the high altitude stuff." Ruzek includes.

"Don't say another word," Jay says. "I know the perfect guy. He did the explosives case with us last year. Mouse, you remember him?"

Akhil's head shot up and looked at Jay.

"Yeah. He did a great job for us. Call him." Voight said.

Akhil looked at Jay and nodded his head to the break room. Nadia was giving Erin some paperwork, but they could still hear their conversation.

Akhil spoke first. "Mouse? As in DOD Comms satellite hacking Mouse? The same Mouse that hacked NSA and the FBI? That Mouse?"

"Yeah. That Mouse. Look he's clean now. This job can bring him some stability. Plus he's good with computers and that stuff."

"Ok. Look I don't have a problem with Mouse being here, I just want to make sure you are ok. I know you both were in the same unit and I know about the convoy."

"How do you know?"

"You told me when you were high and drunk as fuck the night after mom died."

"Alright. Look I gotta call him. Trust me on this, he is the man for the job."

Later that day Mouse walked in and sat in the break room. He and Jay were talking before Jay showed him around the bullpen. He took a seat at an empty desk and turned on the computer.

He looked at both Ruzek and Atwater and asked, "So you guys were in charge of the tech before, huh?"

Both said, "Yeah."

"Let me ask you. You got a CAT5 or a Fiber wire?"

Atwater and Ruzek both stuttered before Atwater asked, "Uh, what do you think?"

"I'll figure it out."

Akhil then walks into the bullpen after hearing the conversation. "Fiber wire. Ethernet cables aren't reliable in security and performance for this unit, so fiber optics seemed the way to go."

Mouse looked up. He knew that voice anywhere. "Akhil? Hey little man." Mouse got up and hugged him while laughing.

"Can't call me little man anymore. I'm taller than you by like 3 inches and way more stronger."

Ruzek interrupts us. "Wait, how do you know that stuff Akhil?"

"I was always interested in tech. All forms of it."

Mouse speaks up. "Interested? This kid got a full scholarship to MIT for computer engineering."

"Ok Mouse, let's not talk about that."

Ruzek looks at Atwater and then Mouse. "So wait, you three know each other?"

"Yeah, I could tell you some stories about these guys."

Akhil and Jay both looked at Mouse and simultaneously said, "Ha, you won't though."

Voight walked out and stood between Akhil and Jay. Jay introduced him.

"Sarge this is Mouse."

Mouse speaks. "It's a silly nickname, but I am the first to admit it."

"What's this about a truck full of Blu-ray DVD players last year?"

"Uh well actually that case was expunged-"

"And what's this about a DOD Comms satellite hack in 09?"

"For that I take full responsibility."

Akhil smacked his face with his hand at the sheer idiocy of his friend's behavior.

After settling in Mouse's space was actually in the basement. These three would usually hang out there after shift for an hour or two just talking.

A few weeks went by and Mouse was getting accustomed to the team. To be honest, he was doing much better from when Akhil last spoke to him. He was clean and got his own place. He even seems interested in a girl name Sylvie Brett over at Firehouse 51 and was getting close to her. One day Akhil got to meet her.

"Hey Akhil! Are you and Dawson going over to 51?"

"Yeah, he needs to drop something off to Gabby."

"Can you give Sylvie this sweater? She left it at my place."

Akhil raised his eyebrow.

"Not like that. She came over for drinks and we talked. That's it."

"Uh huh. Alright I owe you one anyway."

"Thanks man."

Antonio and Akhil drive over to the Firehouse. We entered the hangar and saw Hermann. Akhil got his attention. Since that fire, Akhil has been close to Hermann, kind of looking up to him as a father figure.

"Yo Daddio." Akhil yelled.

Hermann turned around and smiled instantly when he saw Akhil. They both shook hands and hugged. While Antonio looked for Gabby, Akhil didn't know who Brett was so he asked Hermann.

"So what brings you here Akhil?"

"Actually a friend of mine asked me to return this sweater to someone called Sylvie Brett."

"Ok. She's inside. Come with me."

Akhil and Hermann entered the station talking about his kids and how his oldest is getting ready for college. He asked for a few pointers and Akhil just laughed.

"Na man. I got accepted, but I chose the Rangers. So can't really help with the college questions."

We waited in the lounge for Sylvie Brett to walk in and we greeted each other. When I mentioned the sweater and gave it to her, her face turned completely red and she practically ran away from us. Akhil made a note to himself to catch Mouse off guard with this.

Antonio finished talking to his sister and they were on the way out, when their radios went off.

"10-1. 10-1. 26-22. Shots fired. Officer down. My partner's been shot." The person on the radio said an address close to the Firehouse, so Akhil called in an ambulance to that location.

Antonio looked over to him bewildered.

"What?" Akhil asked. "Can never be too careful."

They arrived at the scene to see Jay and Erin pointing their guns to the building. They pulled theirs too and moved the hurt police officer behind the car for protection.

Turns out there was a shooter actively targeting the Chicago PD. They got a tip about the same car from the shooting abandoned down an alley. Everyone arrived except for Voight and Olinsky who were checking out other identities of the shooter. Burgess came over and Jay led everyone down the alley. Akhil heard his radio go from a clear voice to just static and had a bad feeling about this and got Jay's attention.

"Stop. Everybody stop."

Everyone looked at Akhil. "Just walk back and take cover on either sides of the alley."

Once they did, Antonio grabbed Akhil's shirt. "What the hell?"

"Think about this. An empty alley, an abandoned car with both a metal fence and a trashed up sofa confiding it, jammed comms, and a rooftop directly in from of us."

Jay looked over and tried to figure out what Akhil was saying. "Antonio, go to your car and get my bag from the trunk."

Antonio returns a few seconds later with the bag. Akhil unzips it and takes out two Army issued M4s and hands one to Jay. He then takes out four smoke grenades and looks at Jay.

"Jay. Get to the building on our right top floor. You've done surveillance. You know how this is done. Get a vantage point, but keep your gun to this building in front of us. Give us cover. Dawson and Lindsay, there is a huge possibility that the shooter is waiting for us now, so I am going to throw these smoke grenades and try to obscure us from him. I will go first, then the rest of you. Got that?"

They nodded and we proceeded as planned. I threw all four smoke grenades into the alley, only to have a bullet hit a patrolman right through her head. Everyone took cover, but Akhil was pissed. He entered the smoke despite Erin and Antonio calling his name. The smoke disappeared and the shots stopped. The patrolmen took away the officer and went to Chicago Med. The rest of us went to the top of the building and found shell casings of close to 50 bullets. Atwater then found a rope on the side of the building, which the shooter used to repel down.

Akhil looked down the building side and followed the rope with his gaze. _It's not that far down. Maybe 15 feet. We trained for jumping 35 when they assigned me to that new unit,_ he thought. He took 5 steps back while everyone else was preoccupied with clearing the building. He ran and heard Erin screaming, "Akhil!" He landed with a roll before getting back up to his feet.

Erin and Jay looked at each other like, _what the fuck just happened?_ Akhil just waved back at them saying the shooter left in a getaway vehicle. They could see the tire marks after they met downstairs. Jay pulled Akhil to the side.

"What was that?"

"What was what?"

"The jumping off the building."

"Oh, see that's was part of my training and I used it."

"Ok what about the guns? Why do you have grenades with you?"

"I will explain everything at the precinct, but we need to meet with Voight right now. I have a feeling we can narrow down our suspects."

They arrived at the precinct and Voight wanted a rundown as to what happened. Everyone was just trying to understand what happened. Akhil started paying attention when Jay spoke.

"Uh, Will said that she, uh, died before she hit the ground from what ever the…"

"Did we get a look at him?" Voight asked.

"Boss he kept low. This guy the way he shot, he was trained." Ruzek said.

Jay was pissed. "He was military. The truck was a lure, it was bait. We never should have been in the alley. That son of a bitch knew we would come in hot. We had no cover, he had a remote vantage point, triangulated us from above, and then we were FREAKING TARGET PRACTICE."

Akhil finally spoke. "He's not military."

Everyone turned their head to him.

"What?" Voight asked.

"He is a cop. The sound of the shot was the same sound you get of a 700 SPS rifle. That rifle is used by the SWAT. And the way he shot didn't show military training. First, he could only hit someone in the clear. Two, no military man shoots into smoke. You're wasting your time. Three, as soon as I was out of the smoke and he saw me, he ran. Why not shoot me? Because the son of a bitch is scared. If you are a soldier and you are carrying out this vendetta, you will not run scared. And lastly, he took out our comms. You need to know police frequencies for it work like that. So no this guy is not a soldier, he's a fucking cop."

Everyone was just stunned and looking at Akhil.

Dawson spoke first. "How do you know this? And how do you have military grade gear in your bag, which is in my trunk?"

"That's a story for later, but first we need to check for cops on vendettas. Sarge, are there any cops who were either fired within the past 35 years?"

"Yeah kid."

"Ok we need to check them. We should also check each fallen officer's family. You never know if they have a hidden agenda for the people they feel responsible for their loved one's death."

"But why 35 years?" Ruzek asks.

"This is a planned out attack against the police department. Either some guy was fired and he is pissed, which makes him older than us, or someone got screwed by the department and they are even more pissed, which means he is around my age."

/

They found the shooter later that night and after failed negotiations, Olinsky shot him. Everyone got back to the district and into the bullpen. Dawson spoke first.

"Ok Akhil. It's later. Tell us how you really are."

Akhil looked around the bullpen. Everyone was there, including Nadia. He took a deep breath.

"Everyone sit down." Akhil said it in a tone that clearly stated he was in charge. Voight was the only one standing against the doorframe outside his office.

"As you know, I enlisted after high school. Boot camp was supposed to be hard, but it didn't feel as challenging as they made it to be. My Drill Sargent saw that I was excelling and recommended me to some different unit, I didn't know what at the time. I just wanted to be pushed, you know? So I'm shipped overseas to India, where the rest of my training was resumed. There were about 50 of us. These were the best soldiers of both America and India. After training, they split us into teams of 8. My team had Mark, Jake, Susan, Nick, Abby, Kyle, and Hallie. At first, it was training, but these seven people became my family. Mark, Jake, Susan, Nick, Abby, and Kyle were all married and older than me by like 10 years, but Hallie was only older than me by five. Those 6 considered me as their son, while Hallie was like my older sister." Akhil closed his eyes and took a deep breath. Jay walked up to him and put his hand on his back saying it's ok.

"After training, we all met our General, who literally said 'My name is General.' So our team was debriefed as to what we are. We were an elite Special Forces team who's objective was to infiltrate and take down. It meant terrorist organizations, military governments, you name it. We were successful for almost 4 years, until our last op, before I came here. We were at a safe house in Stafford, Virginia. It's where we had to be for two weeks before any op. We were told to infiltrate the Haqqani Network that operated from the mountains near the LOC between Pakistan and India. They were suspected of financing Al-Qaeda, even after Bin Laden's death." Akhil shuddered at the end of his sentence. Jay just stood beside him listening.

"We infiltrated, well I infiltrated. I rose from the ranks of just a soldier, to a trusted right hand of the second in command within two weeks, gained his trust, and found the perfect time for my team to attack. I don't know how, but we were made. I was captured and held hostage for 9 days. That's where most of my scars came from. They tortured for fun, not for information." Jay was shocked, but Akhil kept going unaffected.

"My team found me in a small town in a valley. They attacked, but hesitated when it came to saving my life. The terrorist had a gun to my head, while another had a knife to my neck. My team was ordered to stand down, and they did despise me saying no and pleading them. I told them everything to make them finish the mission. 'I have no family. Everyone left me. Do not trade my life for anyone. Leave before it's too late.' But they didn't listen. They surrendered, and one by one I was forced to watch them behead my team." At this point, tears are falling down Akhil's cheeks. He looked down at his feet and pulled himself together.

"The Army attacked the base with more manpower 3 days later. I was rescued, but unconscious most of the time. The next thing I remember, I'm in India in a military hospital. After I was released, the General gave me two options, to either go back and join another team, or go stateside to the safe house until they find me employment. After losing my team, my mom, and my brothers, I just couldn't be held responsible for another life, so I came back. I stayed at the safe house for 3 months, working on the farm and fixing up the house. Then, I was called and given a job offer here. So I took it. I needed the stability. I needed to feeling of protecting someone other than me, so I jumped at this opportunity. Before leaving, the General left the safe house to me since I was their squad leader. He stocked the house with military issued weapons and said that he would take care of any problem with those. Hence the bag today. And now I'm here, but my team's dead. They died and I'm left like the punch line to a sick joke."

Everyone had tears in their eyes. Akhil couldn't take it anymore and left the bullpen. Jay stood in place, shocked at hearing what his brother went through. Erin had tears streaming down here face. Antonio, Kevin, and Adam were speechless. Voight was just Voight, but a little softness showed in his facial expression. Olinsky and Mouse were the only ones who just listened and waited for him to finish. Nadia was pretty much the same as Erin, but more. She followed Akhil out of the bullpen.

She found him in the locker room in front of the sink, sobbing uncontrollably. She walked up slowly and hugged him from behind, putting her arms around his waist. She just let him get it all out. It sounded like he needed this after a long time of blaming himself. After a couple of minutes, he stopped and washed his face. He turned around.

"I'm sorry. We really need to stop making this our place."

"Don't apologize. I'm here. Not just for dating you. I'm here for all of you. I'm your rock. Lean on me when you need to."

"I'm afraid that if you know everything I went through, you'll leave. I can't lose you."

"You need to know that I am completely in love with you Akhil Raghu. I plan on staying by your side forever. We are going to get married, have kids, and maybe even a dog. We're going to live in a nice house with a fence and a small play place for the kids. We are going to take nice long walks in the neighborhood and maybe even camp out right in the back yard under the stars. This is all you and me."

Akhil just looked at Nadia. He took her face in his hands and kissed her softly and passionately.

"I fell in love with you the day I saw you walk into my life at Molly's."

They both held hands and walked out towards the bullpen. Everyone was there, so they remembered to walk separately into the bullpen. Antonio raised his eyes at Akhil, but Akhil ignored him and sat down.

"Now you know why I push my self too far every case and why I do it alone."

Antonio walked over to Akhil's desk.

"You have been through a lot, but this isn't just a team. We are also your family. We care about you and would be devastated if anything happened to you. I understand that you don't want to get us killed, but we signed up for it the day we pinned a badge to our chests. Everyone in this room did."

And with that Antonio walked off. Adam then came to Akhil.

"So, are you and Nadia dating?"

Akhil looked at Nadia, Jay, and Erin and they all just shrugged. He looked at Adam and without backing down said, "Yes. I am with Nadia."

"Raghu, Nadia, in my office now." Voight said.

 _At least he's no angry now,_ though Akhil. They got up and walked together and looked at Jay and Erin. Then Erin did something extremely idiotic. She jumped up and said, "Halstead and I are together too."

"HALSTEAD, LINDSAY, YOU TOO." Voight barked.

 _So much for not being angry,_ Akhil thought.

Olinsky slapped Adam behind the head and Antonio punched him in the shoulder.

"Ow! Ow! What did I do? I just asked Akhil."

Once they were in Voight's office, Erin closed the door. Erin and Nadia sat down, while Jay and Akhil stood behind them waiting for Voight to speak.

"I knew that you four have gotten close since the hit out on Halstead and Raghu. I wanted you to tell me what was going on. I gave so many hints, but you guys didn't get it. I don't support in house romances, but what happens out of my unit isn't my business or the district's. Erin and Nadia, you are dismissed."

Everyone was kind of shocked and didn't move. Erin and Nadia stood up after a few seconds and then left the room leaving Akhil and Jay with Voight.

"Now I will make myself very clear. If either of you hurt them, I will kill you and no one will find your body."

Akhil and Jay just looked at Voight, not really knowing what to say. They were still shocked he gave them his blessing in a sense.

Jay spoke next. "Yes sir."

"Good now get out of here. We are done for the day."

When they walked out, everyone was in the bullpen waiting for them.

"Well?" asked Adam.

Jay and Akhil looked at each other and smiled. Akhil walked up to Nadia and kissed her hard, while Jay did the same. Antonio was happy and looked at Ruzek and Atwater, whose faces dropped at the sight of both couples. Voight walked out and both couples broke apart. He just smiled and left. Mouse walked up to the bullpen and saw them as well. He was genuinely happy for both Akhil and Jay. They had been through so much.

"Well if everything is ok, let's head to the memorial service and then home." Antonio says.

Akhil took Nadia's hand while Jay took Erin's and they all walked out of the district.


	9. Chapter 8: Don't Forget But Don't Dwell

Chapter 8: Don't Forget, But Don't Dwell

Akhil, Nadia, Jay, and Erin went on a double date to the mall. They wanted to bring Will and his girlfriend, but they were getting their furniture and stuff ready for moving in together. It was a quiet Saturday and everyone was enjoying themselves. Erin and Nadia took forever trying on dresses, but Akhil and Jay just laughed each and every time they went back and changed.

After three hours of shopping, they sat down in the Food Court eating lunch. They were all talking about that new Doctor Strange movie and how it was actually interesting for Nadia and Erin, when all of a sudden someone interrupted their conversation.

"Piglet?"

Akhil froze in the middle of his sentence. He didn't even bother turning around, but his face was drained of any color. Jay, Nadia, and Erin were just quiet and listening

After a few seconds, Akhil turned to meet the person called him the nickname that embarrassed him throughout high school.

"Wow, Akhil you've changed."

Akhil just stared at the girl. If looks could kill, this girl would die, then come back alive only to be dead again.

"What do you want Emily?"

"Just want to say hi to my high school classmate."

"Is that it?"

"Well, we have a reunion tonight. It's for everyone who has gone to our school so Jay and Will should come too. I'm single, so you can finally ask me out on that date."

"You think that after what you did, I would still feel the same about you? After everything you put me through?"

"Look, I was young and immature, but I'm here now."

"I'll be at the reunion, but I'm bringing my girlfriend with me."

Akhil took Nadia's hand and walked away with Jay and Erin. They left the food court and went to the next store. Jay took Erin to the side.

"Can you and Nadia hang out for sometime? I need to talk to him."

"Of course. Looks like we need an outfit for tonight anyway."

Jay smiled and kissed Erin. They walked up to Akhil and Nadia who were in the middle of a conversation. Nadia was speaking.

"You don't have to go tonight."

"I know, but I want to. I want you to know all about me and if that means some stupid high school prank, then that's what it's going to be." Akhil smirked.

Jay walked up. "Hey Nadia, can I borrow him for sometime? We need to get suits for tonight."

"Ok."

Erin and Nadia walked off to the section of the store they needed to go to, while Jay and Akhil went to their respective section of the store.

"So, how are you holding up?"

"Honestly, I feel both good and bad. Good in the sense that Nadia gets to see my past; bad in the sense I get to see my past again."

"You do know Will and I will be there for you, right?"

"Yeah. You have been since I got back. Frankly, you guys, Erin, and Nadia have made this easier for me. Thanks."

After getting their clothes, the couples went home to get ready for the reunion that night. It was at the school and they were supposed to meet separately. Nadia and Akhil decided to ride their bike. It was actually Nadia's idea. She wanted to make Akhil look as sexy as she could tonight because of that snobby bitch.

Jay and Erin pulled into to the school to find Will and his girlfriend Nina. They were all waiting for Akhil and Nadia.

"Where's Akhil?" Will asked.

"He's going to be here any minute now." Jay said.

"Well it is about time I met your baby brother." Nina says.

"Yeah you will like him. Speaking of Akhil."

The sound of Akhil's motorcycle got louder as he and Nadia approached. He parked the bike and they walked over to their friends.

"Sorry we're late. Didn't know if I really wanted to come."

Erin walked up and hugged Akhil. "You'll be fine. If anything happens, we are there."

Will walked up and patted Akhil on the back. "Jay and I can still kick some ass."

Everyone laughed and walked towards the school. Someone bumped Akhil's shoulder, making him almost lose balance. He didn't even bother to turn around. They kept walking to the gym, where the reunion was held. Everyone was there from Jay's class, Will's class, and Akhil's class.

Ally was there and walked up to Jay. She hugged him, not in an 'I love you' way, but an 'I'm your friend' way. Then she hugged Akhil and Will.

"So… I've heard someone here has a girlfriend." Ally said, winking at Akhil.

"Ha-ha. That's a good one." Akhil says sarcastically. "Nadia, this is Ally. Ally, Nadia."

"It's so nice to meet you." Nadia smiled.

"You as well. When I heard my brother's best friend finally found a person he could trust, I jumped up and down with joy."

Ally turned to Akhil. "Everyone was talking and they want you to play that song from the talent show."

Everyone turned to Akhil as his face reddened. "There is no way I'm playing that song."

Jay spoke next. "Oh come on. It was great. Mom loved it."

Akhil looked at Jay and Will before finally looking at Nadia. "Well, looks like you get to see more of who I was."

He walked up to the stage and grabbed the acoustic guitar. He took off his coat and sat on a stool before speaking into the mike.

"Hello everyone. I've been asked to play a song, so hope you like it."

He starts strumming the tune to a song that Nadia has never heard before, and shortly starts to sing.

 _93 million miles from the sun_

 _People get ready, get ready_

 _'Cause here it comes it's a light_

 _A beautiful light_

 _Over the horizon in to your eyes_

 _Oh, my, my_

 _How beautiful_

 _Oh my beautiful mother_

 _She told me_

 _Son in life you're gonna go far_

 _If you do it right_

 _You'll love where you are_

At this point Jay is watching his baby brother play a song that reminded him of their lives at a much simpler time. He was actually trying to hold back his tears. He still couldn't get rid of the guilt of leaving their brother.

 _Just know that wherever you go_

 _You can always come home_

Erin has tears running down her cheeks. She tries to understand how he could be so broken. Sure she didn't have a good childhood, but when Voight came into the picture, she never lost that sense of safety from them. However, Akhil had it all: the loving mother, the loving brothers, the prep school, the talents, you name it, only for it to be taken away. At least, Erin didn't have it, then got it. He had it all, but lost it. And the worst part is that it wasn't even his fault.

 _240 thousand miles from the moon_

 _You've come a long way to belong here_

 _To share this view of the night_

 _A glorious night_

 _Over the horizon is another bright sky_

 _Oh, my, my_

 _How beautiful_

 _Oh my irrefutable mother_

 _She told me_

 _Son sometimes it may seem dark_

 _But the absence of the light is a necessary part_

 _Just know, that you're never alone_

 _You can always come back home_

Will always protected Akhil. It would be at school, the game, anywhere. One time he ran onto the field when Akhil was chucked during a time out by the opposing team player. He still cant get over the fact he failed him. Will knows how much he needed Jay to finally get back on his feet after their mother's death, he could only imagine how much harder it was for Akhil when everyone left.

 _Oh oh oh_

 _Oh oh oh_

 _You can always come back_

Akhil had his eyes closed the entire time. The past verses just reminded him of painful times. Everyone left and no one even bothered to know how he was doing, but he was right about one thing. That one day, there will be that one person who will stand by his side. So he opened his eyes and looked at the one person he trusted. The one person he decided he is going to spend the rest of his life with.

 _Every road is a slippery slope_

 _There is always a hand that you can hold on to_

 _Looking deeper through the telescope_

 _You can see that your homes inside of you_

 _Just know, that wherever you go_

 _No you're never alone_

 _You will always get back home_

Nadia saw Akhil open his eyes and look straight at her. She wasn't crying. She was so happy that she felt like she will never cry if she was with Akhil. She had a rough childhood as well, bumping from house to house, job to job, until finally finding Erin. She is really grateful that she found Akhil, a man who loves her in every way humanly possible. For the first time in her life, she feels safe.

 _Oh oh oh_

 _Oh oh oh_

 _Oh oh_

 _Oh oh oh_

 _Oh oh oh_

 _Oh oh_

 _93 million miles from the sun_

 _People get ready, get ready_

 _'Cause here it comes it's a light_

 _A beautiful light_

 _Over the horizon in to our eyes_

The entire gym erupts into applause for Akhil. Jay and Will were of course clapping and cheering louder than anyone else. Akhil got off the stage and started walking towards Nadia. When he reached her, he grabbed her by the waist, pulled her closer to him, and kissed her passionately.

/

Everything quieted down after the main events took place. Akhil, Nadia, Jay, Erin, Will, and Nina all sat around a table in the corner away from everyone still trying to be in high school.

Erin still couldn't believe how talented Akhil was. Neither did Nina. After the laughter died down, Nina spoke up.

"So Akhil. How are you so talented?"

Akhil looked at her. "I don't know…I guess I just didn't want anyone to say I was bad at anything. And being at this school makes it too easy for someone to call you out."

Erin spoke up next while raising her eyebrow. "So is there anything you are not good at?"

"Saving lives!" a random voice yelled.

Everyone at the table turned to see a drunk guy behind Jay while Akhil just shook his head.

"You always know how to make an entrance, don't you Akhil."

Akhil just looked at the guy. "So, how have you been piglet? I heard you're a police officer now. And before that you were in the Army."

Akhil finally spoke. "What do you want, Kevin?"

"I just wanna know how they let you in here. Especially after failing to keep our friend alive."

Ally walks up out of nowhere and puts her hand on Kevin's back. "Sorry guys, someone has had a little to much to drink."

Kevin doesn't back down. "No, I want to know. How does a man who cant even protect his best friend be entrusted to protect the country?"

Akhil is mad, but he tries to play it off calmly. He doesn't want to embarrass himself or his family. "Kevin, I think you had to much to drink. Walk it off. We'll talk later."

Akhil turned to Nadia and tried to pick up a conversation, but Kevin was relentless. "Don't turn away from me. Give me an answer. WHY DID YOU LET BEN DIE?"

The entire place was so quiet, you could hear a pin drop. Akhil still didn't want to embarrass himself, so he stood up. Jay and Will were cautiously watching Akhil.

"Kevin, I think you need to leave before you do something you will regret."

"What like kicking you ass?"

"No like me landing you in the hospital for a couple of days. Or like me telling your wife here what really happened that night senior year."

Kevin gulped. Even though the guy was completely wasted, he knew when to stop.

"So that wouldn't be so nice, right?"

Kevin nodded and backed away. Ally started apologizing.

"Don't apologize. We all do things that we don't mean to. Kevin just needed a reminder that we all make mistakes. Go now, Ally. He needs you. Oh, and that night in senior year, nothing to bad. Just him streaking down our neighborhood street after getting really drunk. Don't ask him about it. It was a stupid dare, and lets just say he won." Akhil winked at her before hugging her. She left to comfort her husband.

Everyone at the table was surprised at the way Akhil handled things except for Jay and Will. They always knew Akhil to be the calm one in the family. He always handled things in a mature manner. Jay and Will on the other hand were the two knuckleheads that always needed to be tamed.

Nina was just mesmerized at the way Akhil carried himself. "You seriously are something Akhil."

Akhil just smiled at his brother's girlfriend. "So, Nina, tell us about yourself. I was excited to know my brother moved in with someone."

"Right, so…" Nina went on to talk about her family and childhood. She also talked about how she and Will met. Slowly, without any problems, the night passes by and it was time to go home. Erin wanted Jay to come over, so Akhil took Nadia to the apartment that he and Jay share.

Once they walked into the apartment, they went to the bedroom. Nadia and Erin always kept some clothes here knowing that they would stay over when the four of them got together for movie nights and dinner. Akhil took his clothes and went to the bathroom to give Nadia some privacy to change.

Nadia loved the fact that Akhil respected her so much. She didn't know whether it was because he was shy or not, but it still felt good to be treated that way.

Akhil walked back into the room after Nadia finished changing.

"So, what now?"

"I'm tired. Let's go to sleep."

"Ok, I'll take the couch. You take my bed. I don't want to sleep in Jay's knowing what he and Erin do. Ugh." He makes a disgusted face.

Nadia just smiled and shook her head. "Akhil, come to bed."

"Are you sure?"

"Are you ready yet?"

"Not yet."

"Then come here and let me cuddle with you. You are my boyfriend and I am your girlfriend. I feel safe in your arms at all times and I just want to be in your arms tonight. So, if you are done, can you please come to bed?"

Akhil smiled and got in the bed next to Nadia. He laid down on his back while she rested her head on his chest.

"I love you Nads."

"I love you too Akhil."


End file.
